Is South Africa Safe for Gay Travelers? What It’s Really Like.
We were nervous about visiting South Africa as a gay couple. You hear it all the time: that it’s dangerous. Not just for the LGBTQ+ community, but for all travelers. But after spending two weeks exploring the country, we can only say: WOW.
Why South Africa Was on Our Bucket List (Despite the Risks)
When we first told people we were going, the reactions ranged from raised eyebrows to “are you sure?” awkward moments. And we get it. It’s easy to assume an African destination would be dangerous for queer travelers, but South Africa is a country of contrasts, and what we found was far more complex, and honestly, more hopeful than we expected. We had never thought about visiting until a South African friend of ours told us how amazing it was, showed us images and from there, we knew we had to go.
As a gay interracial couple, we visited Cape Town, the Winelands, safari territory, and Johannesburg. And now we’re sharing what it was really like — the good, the bad, and the beautiful.
A Country of Contrasts: Legal vs. Lived Reality
People don’t know this because it’s easier to fear something you don’t know than to look into the facts. But South Africa actually has some of the most progressive LGBTQ+ laws in the world. It was the first country globally to outlaw discrimination based on sexual orientation (1996), and the fifth to legalize same-sex marriage (2006). So on paper, it’s a safe haven!
But the lived reality is more nuanced. While Cape Town feels proudly queer and has a vibrant LGBTQ+ scene, other parts of the country — especially rural areas — are more conservative. In Johannesburg, the vibe is mixed, but there’s a thriving queer scene if you know where to look. However, this goes for ANY country, even in the U.S. You can go to Chicago and then suburbs, and the sentiment towards gay people will be night and day.
But one thing is true: we never felt in danger in South Africa, both as gay travelers and tourists. We did ‘de-gay’ ourselves a bit but it wasn’t from fear but rather habit. And that alone says a lot about how most of us travel as queer people, but anyway, South Africa!
Navigating South Africa as a Gay Couple: What We Did & How We Felt
Exploring Cape Town: This was our third time in Africa, but our first in South Africa. We landed in Cape Town, explored for a few days before heading to Franschhoek and Stellenbosch, flying up to Hoedspruit for safari, and ending in Johannesburg.
From the moment we arrived in Cape Town, we felt at home. People were kind, chatty, and welcoming, even striking up conversations over our morning coffee. We based ourselves in Sea Point, a beautiful seaside neighborhood that gave us stunning views and epic sunsets.
Cape Town blew us away. A quick glance at the views and we knew it’d quickly become one of our favorite cities, and it did. The food, the views, the culture, the hiking, the history… it’s all there. After traveling 30+ countries together, we know how rare it is to find a destination that truly has everything. Cape Town does.
As a gay couple, we embraced publicly and never had issues. No weird stares. No double takes. While we’re not big on holding hands, we felt we could have if we wanted to. Trust us, it was very clear we were a couple lol and it seemed no one cared, in the best way.
The Winelands: Next up on our trip was Franschhoek and Stellenbosch. This was easily a highlight, not just for the stunning landscape, but because we love wine and the Winelands did not disappoint!! Personally, we loved Franschhoek over Stellenbosch but both were great and accessible from Cape Town (we took an Uber there, it was that easy). Hotel staff and locals were all warm and welcoming. We shared a bed with no issues. It was peaceful, romantic, and totally our vibes. We’d 100% come back here!
Safari in Greater Kruger: Flying to Hoedspruit for our safari was thrilling to say the least! We’d never done a safari, and we’d had such a great trip so far that we wondered if it could possibly get better. Spoiler: it did! We stayed at a safari lodge that ended up being so gay-friendly, which made the hours of research well worth it. We slept in the same bed in a bush tent in the middle of nowhere, it was amazingggg. Though, having to be escorted by a staff member with a flashlight every night due to ‘possible encounters’ left much to the imagination but we quickly shoved the intrusive thoughts down and focused on how incredible it was to be there. How lucky we were. If you’ve ever done a safari, you know that feeling of being completely remote in pure bliss. Now imagine that paired with the comfort of being completely yourself. It was freedom.
Also important: the lodge was ethical. Most people don’t know this, but a lot of luxury safari lodges domesticate and/or fence in animals so guests can tick off the Big Five. That felt icky and so wrong to us. We wanted to see animals in their natural habitat, not staged for Instagram. And we’re glad we stuck to that because our lodge was respectful of the land and the animals, and we still got to see 4 out of the Big Five! (If you’d like the lodge name, DM us on social or email us and we’ll happily share privately.)
Johannesburg: Okay, here is the ugly. And to be clear, this has more to do with general tourist safety than being gay travelers. As a gay couple, we had no issues in Johannesburg. In fact, we actually enjoyed our time there. We visited the Apartheid Museum, Nelson Mandela’s former home in Soweto, and a few other key landmarks. The history in this city is powerful, and we were in awe. But here’s why we’re calling this section “ugly”: it’s what the locals repeatedly told us.
“Be careful.”
“Don’t run outside.”
“Don’t drive at night.”
“Hide your phone — it can get dangerous.”
From hotel staff to Uber drivers, we heard these warnings again and again. and honestly, it scared the heck out of us. While we personally didn’t have any problems, one night we took a late-night Uber and were on edge the entire ride, purely because of the horror stories we’d heard. Carjackings, armed robberies at red lights… it felt like a lot. We’re glad we went, but if you’re planning a visit, be smart, stay alert, and do your research. This isn’t about being gay. It’s about being a tourist in a city with real safety challenges.
Our Top Safety Tips for Gay Travelers in South Africa
Again, we didn’t feel unsafe for the majority of our trip, but like Omie, we know some of you can be Nervous Nellies, so here are some tips to lessen the anxiety:
✅ Stay in international hotel chains if you are nervous. International chains are a good fallback, though we mostly stayed in local spots and felt fine.
✅ Limit PDA in public. Kissing and holding hands might attract stares in more conservative areas, but hugs and subtle affection should be fine. It was for us.
✅ Use dating apps cautiously. If you’re traveling solo and want to get on the apps (we know how some of you are because we’ve been there 😉), be smart and always meet in public places first. But again, based on our experience, we think you’ll be just fine.
✅ Dress modestly to avoid standing out. We can see someone with painted nails or tight shorts being stared at, but we don’t think it would be harmful in any way. Just be mindful is all. We’re coming from a cis gay couple, our experience on this is very different, so do your own research!
✅ Join gay travel groups for real-time advice, on Facebook or Reddit. Always nice to make some friends ahead of visiting, or at the very least getting recs on what to do, though our upcoming itinerary will do just that!
Final Thoughts: Would We Recommend South Africa to Gay Travelers?
A roaring heck yes! We’re actually planning to visit again this year, or the next. It really is that special. We spent two weeks there and felt we only scratched the surface. There is just SO much to do. We didn’t do penguin beach, the Garden Route everyone talks about, and so much more.
But beyond that, as gay travelers and gay couple, we not once felt like we had to go back into the closet as we have felt in other countries. We actually have queer friends of ours visiting this year, and they’re doing everything we did. It just makes us happy knowing that so many of you can feel comfortable and confident traveling far and wide, so please if you’re still feeling anxious, follow us on social media and DM us your questions. We’d be happy to help!
And as always, safe and happy travels!
Davey & Omie
PS: We are currently working on a very detailed itinerary (it’s taken us weeks to put together!), so please stay tuned as we’re hoping to go live in the coming weeks! Follow us on social or join our mailing list to stay in touch.
